Tuesday Lessons

I sit here with an aching back and an aching nose. My back is aching because I've been standing on concrete (aka my kitchen floor) for the last 2 hours making and cleaning up after dinner. My nose is aching to smell the brownies that are in the oven. Let me explain...

It all started last week when my husband and I went grocery shopping at Aldi. I am a firm believer in Aldi and love 1. How far my dollar goes there and 2. The large selection in each food group. Well I went with my list of things to buy and on it was pork shoulder so that I could make BBQ pulled pork sandwiches in my crock pot tonight. Well all my local Aldi had in terms of pork was pork chops. Now experience has taught me that when it comes to pulled pork sandwiches pork chops do not shred the same as pork shoulder. So I decided to pick something else and alter the menu for tonight. I landed on the Fit and Active Rotisserie Flavored Turkey Breast Tenderloins. After consulting with my husband and explaining that we were NOT having pulled pork (or pulled turkey) sandwiches and that we would just have this nicely flavored turkey breast with some mashed potatoes etc. He obliged.

So...tonight...the night of the turkey breast tenderloin disappointment. I was so excited to cook it because it was a super easy "put it in the oven and forget it for a whole hour!" type of meal. My kind of meal sometimes. So I cooked it with some baby carrots, made up some homemade mashed potatoes from Yukon gold potatoes (the best kind of potato in my opinion) and by 6 o' clock we were sitting down to eat. An sitting down to disappointment. The turkey was terrible. The flavoring was not rotisserie flavored it was more of a cajun/pepper-y flavor. I truly cannot even describe it accurately because I had about 5 bites before I was done.

I also learned tonight that when making gravy you can make it in the microwave when pressed for time. You dissolve your chicken bullion in hot water, keep nuking it until it dissolves. Then slowly mix in cornstarch and nuke until it thickens. Ok so this isn't a very good recipe but that's because I got really impatient waiting for it to thicken so I thought "hey lets try flour instead and see if it thickens it faster"....four, three, two, one...beep. Ok. Open the microwave. Gravy EVERYWHERE. Did you know that if you microwave flour it basically explodes? I did not. Until tonight. Luckily I let it cool down while we "ate" and by the time I went to clean up the liquid mess it had solidified enough that it did not run all over the place.

So I was seriously considering just having cereal for dinner since it was such a bust but then my mind went to brownies. "why don't I just save those calories for brownies? duh!" So that is why I sit here, smelling the lovely homemade brownies. Drool seeping out of the corners of my mouth...down my chin...you get the picture. I used this amazing recipe I found on Pinterest. I fell in love with it because it tastes identical to the Betty Crocker box brownie mix but it's homemade! Yes I know homemade is always better but I was so in love with the box mix I could never find a homemade brownie recipe that compared...until this one!

Picture courtesy of website as mentioned above. 

Crispy layer on top. Soft, chewy layer underneath...holy crap why am I still typing and not eating my weight in brownies?

So lessons learned
1. Don't buy "rotisserie" flavored anything and expect it to taste good.
2. Don't microwave anything with flour in it
3. When dinner sucks...just make brownies!

The flu bug

Let me start by saying I've never gotten the flu. I know crazy right? I've had my share of strep throat, sinus infections, colds etc but never the flu. I'm still not sure I even have the flu but when I went to the Dr. the other night that is what she said I have, or might have. The flu. The gosh darn, good-for-nothing flu. And when does it decide to hit me? The night before my husband comes home...so a week ago. I've been a coughing, hacking, miserable sick person for a week. Boy when it hits it hits hard and stays a while. Like a relative you never see but when you do see them they decide to take up residence in your guest room (my lungs) for way longer than you were expecting them to stay. I've got things to do Uncle Chester...can you please leave? Anyone else picturing those Mucinex commercials with those green globby characters? I get that commercial now, I didn't before but now I do.

So the past week as miserable as I have been I've also been as productive as possible. I've gone to work (too soon which is why I'm still sick), I've kept up with all my "womanly duties" as my husband calls them, I've opened my Etsy store, had one Etsy order AND was recognized on the blog www.madebytheshop.wordpress.com for my Etsy shop. I guess I can say it's been a pretty good week despite the fact that I really would like a whole 8 hours of solid sleep without waking up to cough up a lung. That would just be the nicest thing in the world right now. Solid sleep. Getting through washing dishes without feeling tired and nauseous. Or reminding myself it's time to dose up on Dayquil so I can get better.

The Mud House at Etsy.com

I will say that being sick means you get to feel less guilty about sitting around watching TV. That is probably the best part about being sick - zoning out in front of endless episodes of Friends and Gilmore Girls but there also comes a point when you cannot watch another episode and you have to get up and do something...ANYTHING.

I should be better by Monday. That is what the Dr. said. "You're on day 5...maybe so you probably have 2-3 days left. Just lay low and get plenty of rest and fluids" Well Doc if I'm not better by Monday I'm coming to see you again and getting some real drugs and maybe that x-ray you talked about to rule out Pneumonia. Speaking of Pneumonia that is one word I never could spell when I was younger but all of a sudden I can spell it without hesitation. Weird?

So here I sit, another Saturday going by of doing nothing. Well OK not nothing. I made homemade meatballs and did a load of laundry. But not before I watched an episode of Parenthood - best show ever in my opinion -  it gives me anxiety and tears every time. Cheers to the weekend and I toast you with my shot glass of Dayquil. Here's to getting better. By Monday.

Civilian Life Transistion

Today is the start of a new chapter my life – heck – of OUR life. Today our lives change from Military to Civilian. Four years I waited for this day and it's finally here, I can barely believe it. For the past 4 years our relationship has come second to all things military and I am looking forward having a change of pace – finally!

I've gotten so many questions about our relationship and how it related to the military. I'll try to answer some of them here for anyone who is curious or never did get a real answer from me. 

Did we know each other before my husband went into the USMC? 

  - Yes, my husband and I have known each other since grade school. We dated once back in 2007 but I was the one who broke it off. And broke his heart in the process. I know...I'm terrible

Are you from a military family? 

 - Immediate family no. My husbands Grandfather was in the Army. My Great Grandfather served in WWII. That is about as much military experience either of our families had and yes...that made it harder for everyone (including me) to understand the whole thing. 

Have you been married the whole time he has been in?

 - We started dating 2 months before he "shipped out" and my heart went with him. We exchanged letters (41 to be exact) during his boot camp stint. He came home as often as he could but the first year of his term we saw each other a total of 2.5 months (this includes the first 2 months before he left). His first deployment came right after our engagement. Planning a wedding with no wedding date is NO small task let.me.tell.you. I did not have a wedding date until 2 weeks prior. And even then...it changed a week later. I thought I would loose my freaking mind. But in the end it was all I asked for; small, simple, legal and my dad walking me down the aisle. 

What happened when you got married? Did you live separately or together?

  - Together. We moved to NC a week after our wedding and lived off base for a little over a year. After that time he went on his second deployment and I moved back home to Ohio. 

Was it hard? Didn't time fly?

  - Yes and no to both questions. The hardest parts were saying good bye and keeping communication open. Once you get used to being alone it's nice to have the bathroom all to yourself, the cereal not running out, minimal laundry and eating dinner anytime you want. Going to parties and weddings alone - on the other hand - were hard from day one. Time flew during our time in NC. It seemed like one day I was thinking "this is my life now...it seems like it's going to last forever. And the next week I was thinking "holy crap this is my last day at work...I move next week....my time in NC is over". And then I cried because it flew by. 

What is next on the horizon now that he is out?

  - My husband is technically in the reserves now. Which means he is out of the USMC but if crap happens and they need him back they can technically call him back without hesitation. But in the meantime he has gotten a job working with his brother for a company who sells and repairs air compressors. We are also house hunting now which is strange but exciting!

So there is our story in a small nutshell. We are excited for this new chapter to begin and see where life takes us! 

My Yoga Journey

One year ago today I decided to step into unknown territory. I decided to explore this thing called Yoga. I didn't know what to expect. I didn't even know if I would like it despite hearing everyone I knew that practiced it say they loved it. I didn't think it would teach me so much. I didn't know what I was in for.

I had a free Yoga mat that had taken up space in my closet for years. I was a committed wearer of Yoga pants and so I thought it made sense to actually put it all to use. I also saw the quote "Your pants say Yoga but your butt says Mcdonalds" which really spoke to me. I wasn't concerned that my but said Mcdonalds but I was concerned with being a poser of Yoga-doing. My journey started when I inquired to a cousin about her recent Yoga posts on Facebook. She told me about the app called Pocket Yoga. This app was $3 which I thought was a steal compared to Yoga classes in a studio could cost between $12 per class or up to $100 a month for unlimited classes. The $3 was bargain and perfect way to see if I really wanted to do Yoga.

Well 12 months, 4 Yoga Classes, half a dozen home videos, 71 online videos, hundreds of hours of practice, numerous pictures and videos on my phone later...I'm hooked. I strive to practice every day but we all know that life has a tendency of getting in the way - especially in the way of those things that are good for us - and that usually causes me to practice every other day. But they call it practice for a reason, because you never become perfect. There is always something to improve or make harder (and thus becoming better). This became real to me when I starting taking pictures of my postures and boy...reality check! Even the simplest of poses that I felt I was doing right I ended up doing all wrong. As awkward, time consuming and annoying as taking pictures of myself is, it's really helped improved my posture..in my postures.

Along the way I have acquired another yoga mat, a yoga block, hot yoga towel, a yoga strap and a carrying strap. Not to mention the reputation with all my posts to Social Media about Yoga. My Yoga clothing has expanded and I'm exploring the world of Yoga socks - yes they really do help!

I continue to practice a majority on my own in my own living room. I do venture out to classes when time allows but my last two classes did not cater to my needs so I am a little hesitant to go back at this moment. I prefer to let Jillian Michaels yell at me from my TV :) Doing it in my own living room also allows me to wobble and fall without anyone seeing me. But even the greatest Yogi's fall...it's inevitable.

I have been asked if I will ever teach Yoga and my answer is - it's something I would love to do if time and money allows. Time I have to take out of my already crazy schedule and money I have to find when we are not saving up for a house and paying off debt. I think Yoga Teachers have one of the coolest jobs. You get to wear leggings and comfy shirts all day and you are a lot more free of stress than most!

One of the first things I learned in Yoga that I am most proud of is a handstand. I took a month long challenge on Instagram and as skeptical as I was at first it really truly taught my body how to handstand! Other poses I've learned to love are Crow/Crane Pose, Side Crow, Eight Angle Pose, Pigeon Pose, Dragon Pose and Tree Pose. All heart openener poses are great but I shy away as I don't feel they are beneficial - I'm kidding myself when I think that but honestly I love the challenging poses more. Balance poses like Half Moon Pose, Vertical Splits, Crescent lunge and Warrior 3 are my least favorite. They seem simple and yet I wobble and fall almost every time - Tree pose however is a standing balance pose but I can hold it forever! Hip - opening poses are the most beneficial to me. I learned in a class that I have tight hips - mainly because of Gymnastics/Dance classes over the years. Having stiff angry hips is very common in Yoga which is why there are so many practices for opening the hips. I have a love/hate relationship with all hip-openers mainly because they hurt so good! Arm balance poses are probably my favorite poses. The power and strength your wrists and forearms posses is amazing - I never knew I could hold my body up with just my arms! Poses that still boggle my mind are Scorpion, Forearm Stands, Toe holds, Swinging my feet under & jumping back, Bird of Paradise and Grasshopper Pose. This are all very advanced poses that I no doubt have a goal of eventually reaching them but right now I am comfortable where I'm at in Yoga. Slowly improving but never perfect.

The changes in my mind and body that have come through Yoga have inspired me to keep going - shin muscles exist!? I love the beauty of showing up to the mat and accomplishing what I set out to do. I love having a Yoga agenda that gets thrown off halfway through my practice and my body shows me what it really needs. I also wish I wasn't so late to game of Yoga. I wish I would have started years ago. But today is day one of year number 2. Let it be beautiful. Let it be strong. Let it be self improving. Namaste!

A nutty adventure

Did you know you can eat acorns? Did you know there are 14 different varieties? Did you know there are at least a dozen recipes using acorns? I, like most people never really saw past their cute little hats but these nuts are a secret of the forest that one should explore, understand, and if feeling adventurous enough, eat. But first a disclaimer: Do not eat Acorns raw. All acorns contain a toxin call Tannin. All though the amount of tannin in acorns varies (the bigger the cap the more tannin it has) it has to be leeched out no matter what. Tannin if ingested will not be fatal but it will make you very very sick. Leeching out the tannin is as easy as soaking the nut meat for 24 hours and switching out the water every 8 hours. This story ends with Acorn pancakes (I know right?) But lets start at the beginning...

The mighty Oak

I was able to walk a neighbor's property and scour like a squirrel for acorns. At first I was looking too hard and quickly became discouraged but soon I realized they were right under my nose...er feet. 

How many acorns can you spot?

The stages of acorns: new, ripe and over ripe.

My sweet acorn busting helpers!

After the searching, the busting, and the leeching came the roasting or drying. I did not get a lot of acorn meat from my scavenge but it was a great first time experience for me. If you crack the acorns open and the pale beige meat has an brown spots or lines it can contain worms so these were tossed right away.  Drying the acorns takes a lot longer than you would think. I found no guideline as to how long I should dry them in a low oven so lesson learned here dry them longer than you'd think. I dried mine in a 250 degree oven for 30 minutes.

 I then put them in my coffee grinder to which they turned in to a thick mush. After that I decided to dry the mush for another 30 minutes which made it dry and crispy and much easier to grind.

The second time around of grinding I got the flour consistency I was looking for. I then got to pancake-making. I used this recipe from PBS. This recipe did not call for any sweetener and that is one thing I would change next time. A little honey, maple syrup or brown sugar would be delish!

Mix it up baby now!

Wah-la silver dollar sized acorn pancakes!

Now you want to know how they tasted right? Well they tasted like acorns.. No it wasn't a bad flavor it was just different and would be very easy to get used to especially with the added sweetener. Though I haven't ever tasted a whole wheat or buckwheat pancake I would imagine they taste very similar to these. So in short, it takes a little effort but if you're willing to put it in and do a little hard work you'll be well rewarded with a product you've probably never tried before. My next acorn recipe? Maple Acorn bread!

A wedding wonderland!

This morning as I sit here trying to gain a less than foggy feeling in my head by sipping on coffee, my hair still a helmet of hairspray, I am staring at my beautiful but slightly droopy bouquet and reminiscing about the joy and excitement that was this past week. My dear and loving friend Michelle finally married her cowboy!

A two year relationship of two amazing people became one married couple yesterday. The wedding was perfect. The reception was perfect. The couple that was celebrated was perfect. And I am honored that I was able to spend it with them!

We made new friends. We made memories. We made jokes which lead to continuous laughter. We learned new dance moves. We learned a new language. We learned that as amazing as life is, it does move on and old chapters end and new chapters start. Michelle's new chapter of being a wife has begun and I anxiously await to see how her beautiful heart grows and adapts to this new title. Often through her day yesterday I was reminded of my own wedding two and 3/4 years ago. The anticipation, the excitement and the tears. All that hard work you put into planning your big day makes it turning out perfect all worth it. 

Yesterday also made me miss my husband that much more. Wishing he could share this moment with me. Wishing he could dance with me. Wishing we could return home together so I wouldn't spend another night alone. Going home alone at night is the worst feeling ever - in case you were wondering. 

But not to drag this post down with "oh woes me" thoughts....Michelle and Jeremy are starting a new adventure together. One of laughs and cries, deep heart-to-heart discussions and maybe even a few spats. It's all part of being married but the best part is when the day is done you don't have to go home without each other....you just get to go to bed with the love of your life!

May the Lord's blessings fill your life and your marriage. May you continue to grow together as you grow towards Him. Don't take everything so seriously. Don't hold back. Don't hold it in. Let it out. Let it be. Let love grow!

Congratulations to the newly hitched Mr. and Mrs!

This is how we do it.

Upon talking to a friend recently I was asked THE most common question I've ever been asked regarding having my husband deployed; “How do you do it?” Well I have decided to answer that question so that anyone who really wants my answer can have it. I don't mean for this to be an “in your face, leave me alone” post. I mean for this to simply be a longer explanation than I can explain in the short period of time in which I have these conversations with friends and family. I'm sharing my heart here and I hope that comes across. Men and women go through separation through deployment every day of every year and we all deal with it differently. This is how I deal.

Deployments are hard, let no one ever tell you differently. Every time my husband leaves it seems as though my heart will never feel whole again and things will never get better. The first night he leaves I always find myself sobbing on the couch wondering why it happens to me. This deployment was our first as a married couple so the night he left I honestly felt so empty and incomplete. They say your spouse is your other half and I now understand what it feels like to not have your other half with you – it's horrible. But all you can do is pray and count down the days until he returns home; you're heart only growing fonder.

One of the best ways I have found to deal with deployment is stay busy. This seems like simple science but sometimes it can be harder to fill up every day with something to do especially when you are between jobs. It also means that when I do have things to do I'm always wishing my husband was there sharing in them with me. For every party, wedding, celebration, festival etc. I always have a hard time going solo. That part never gets easier. But if you stay busy most of the time it's easier to not focus on him being gone. I count my blessings that I get to hear from my husband everyday. Our first deployment I was not so lucky so this is a huge blessing even though there are days when communicating through Facebook seems incredibly hard. I know we have it easy compared to the days of letter writing.

Now for every 2 weeks or so of easy days there is always a hard day. The hard days are when you rise in the morning and cry before the coffee is done brewing. You save putting on your mascara until you've convinced yourself you're not going to cry for the rest of the day only setting yourself up for failure. When you hear your wedding song on the radio only adding to the heartache you feel. These are the days when friends, family, bosses, and the occasional bank teller have to either understand or not ask questions. Friends, I have had my fair share of sobbing on the way to work and trying to get enough courage up before going in the building only to loose it again in the bathroom. But I learned early on when you have a hard day you cry it out. You cry your tear ducts dry and you clean yourself up and you continue on. Swallowing the tears only makes it come on stronger later on. I once became really good and swallowing my sadness and let me tell you in the long run it didn't help anything. If you've ever been near me after a phone call with my husband you can attest to some tears being shed. I am still amazed at how the body can go from being so happy to hear my husbands voice to being completely upset the moment we hang up. It gets me every single time.

I'm going to wrap up this answering session by saying I'm not superwoman. I'm not a great Christian example of a strong military wife who isn't bothered daily by this deployment. I am not as strong as you think. I'm not OK with being separated from my husband for a really long period of time. But this is the life I signed up for and I have an amazing husband who is counting down daily with me until we are re-united. We have a God who is binding us together through such a vast distance. We have a love that is only growing stronger for each other every day.

We are less than 300 days away from being done with military life and I'm so excited to begin a normal life!